spicy chicken

October 29, 2009

Maybe I’ll actually try to keep this blog up to date. I haven’t decided yet. However, if I do decide to publish this, which I won’t, and if I do actually have some people who read it, which I also wont, don’t fucking leave comments telling me how shitty a writer I am. I know I’m a horrible writer. I’m not writing this to amuse anyone other than myself, I’m not a good writer, I don’t care. Fuck you.

Anyways, not much happened yesterday, but for some reason all the Koreans at my job really respect me and think I’m great. I don’t know why, I don’t actually do anything. I think it’s just because I’ve been there for longer than most people and I don’t cause them any problems. Lately, they’ve been putting these little posters on all the walls in the hall with a list of kids ID’s and names. So I asked one of the Korean staffers what the posters were all about. Apparently, they're just a list of students who don’t have their pictures in the databases yet. All the Korean staffers were so happy and impressed that I actually asked about it. We have about 12 foreign teachers and I was the only one to ask.

The truth is I don’t really give a fuck about the lists of students names they have posted on the wall. The only reason I asked was because all the foreign teachers were asking me about them. Even the faculty manager (FM) asked me about it. Why the fuck does the FM ask me questions that he should know the answer to before me? Because my girlfriend is one of the Korean staffers. So instead of communicating with the Koreans about what’s going on the FM comes to me first to find out if I know anything through my girlfriend. I don’t want him to ask me about shit, it’s his job to know about shit like that before I do.

The only other thing I have to say is for all you young men out there be very careful when you’re getting intimate with your girlfriends. Last night my girlfriend came over and we had some great hot spicy chicken. Seriously, this stuff will make your mouth bleed and your eyeballs sweat. I love it. Hot chicken is one of my favorite things about Korea. I can get it from 20 different places. The only place back home that had hot chicken was Dominoes pizza. That’s not joke, the only place I could get could hot chicken in my hometown was a fucking pizza joint.

Anyways, back to my advice. If you happen to be eating hot chicken with your girlfriend some night; make sure that after you’ve finished eating it you don’t forget to wash your hands. If you forget to wash your hands your girlfriend will not be happy. She thought I did it on purpose, that I intentionally didn’t wash my hands because I wanted to burn her holiest of holy places because we got in an argument the night before. I would never do something like that. Why would I want to spoil the mood? It’s not like I get laid in the middle of the week very often. Sex has been pretty much relegated to a weekend activity now that her father caught on that she had been coming to my house every night until 2am, and not hanging out with her girlfriends. So, now we only get to spend late evenings together on Fridays and Saturdays.

So my advice you ask? Wash your hands. Hot chicken sauce will be hot in places other than your mouths. And it's much more likely to get you in trouble in the other places.